Lately some events have occurred that have both saddened and given me peace. It has really brought the concept of life seasons into focus. Two very dear people in my life have recently departed this world. My grandfather and a good friend. Papa had been slowly approaching the end of his life for sometime. As it was clear that he would not be with us much longer I made in effort to take Oliver over to see his great grandfather. We would usually stop in to see he and my grandmother after our morning workout class. I always found it amusing that Papa thought that he had gotten to hold Oliver at one time. He was very shaky and weak so we didn't let him hold Ollie. He would tell us from time to time "I've held him, but Anna hasn't." It was almost like the child's chant na na na boo boo at my grandmother. We just let him think that he had held Ollie because really what was the harm in it. Papa was adamant that he did not ever want to be put in a nursing home, and he got his wish. He was able to stay at home with 24 hour care and in the end hospice became involved to keep him comfortable. He died early one morning in his home with his wife and two of his children and a daughter in law by his side.
One of my cousins took a picture of Oliver and Papa the day before Papa died. Papa was in his bed and my mom had put Oliver in bed with him while Papa was eating a banana. Bananas are Oliver's most favorite food and he did not feel it was fair that Papa got to have one and he didn't. So in those last few hours of life Papa and Oliver shared a banana. It is a wonderful picture and I am so glad to have it. It was such a special moment that at Papa's funeral the pastor talked about it. How in that one instance there was the beginning of life and the end of life. The taking of first breaths and the taking of last breaths. The pastor discussed the sharing of the banana as similar to communion.
I have been forever grateful that Papa lived long enough to meet his great grandson. I have discussed my fears in the early days of Oliver's life where I was not sure that he would be able to come home.
This week we said goodbye to one of Oliver's "aunties". Jan was a member of our church and for as long as I can remember she has been a friend of ours. Jan was such a special woman and always so happy and kind. Jan was part of the prayer group at church and also visited people who were sick. She and our other friend Sunny made the trip down to Peoria to see me before Oliver was born. She would send me cards in the mail as well during my time in pregnant lady jail. The thing that I will remember the most about Jan was that she was so excited and happy to hear of Oliver's birth. She was the only one and I think it was because she knew that he would be alright. Since she passed several people have told me that she was so excited to spread the word of Oliver's birth and just thought that it was wonderful that he was here. That is not the usual reaction for a baby born so early. Jan and Sunny came to visit Oliver in the NICU when he was about two or three weeks old. My mom and Jan sat together beside Ollie's fish tank while I went and pumped. When I got back I stayed out in the hallway with Sunny visiting with her and looking at mom, Jan, and Ollie through the window. Sunny told me that Jan was so very excited to come down and see Oliver that it was all she would talk about for days leading up to the visit.
During Jan's funeral service Oliver was mentioned again. During Jan's last few months my mom would take Oliver over to visit when I went to the Y. The pastor discussed how holding Oliver would give Jan a feeling of peace. I am glad that she was able to have some comfort in her final moments. Once again I was presented with the dawn and twilight of life. It is my hope that Oliver will be able to continue to provide peace and comfort to others as he progresses through the seasons of his life.
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