When we found out we were expecting our second child and voiced our concerns about the very real possibilities of going on bedrest with a young toddler at home, we were told the usual "helpful" stories of other women on bedrest with other children at home. My favorite is "I have a friend of a friend who was on bedrest with all of her kids and it wasn't that bad/easier than she thought." I am calling bullsh*t on these types of stories. First off, I have no doubt that the friend struggled to some degree. It is NOT easy to lay around day in and day out. It is especially not easy to watch someone else care for your child. It is mentally exhausting to live with the stress of having a high risk pregnancy (after all, doctors do not put you on bedrest on a whim). It is physically exhausting as your endurance decreases and your muscle mass lessens.
Now, I know several women who have been on bedrest since having Oliver, all of them agree that it is not an easy thing to do.
I also LOOOOOVE to be told that "things will be just fine this time, you shouldn't worry." Yes, I certainly hope and pray that things will be just fine with this baby. I would love to experience a normal pregnancy, but that is not in the cards for me. As for not worrying easier said than done. Perhaps, if I was only dealing with my cervix maybe I would be a bit more relaxed since getting the cerclage. However, the placenta previa has added a whole other level of stress and worry. I have already had two bouts of bleeding because of the previa. It is scary to check your pants each time you go to the bathroom.
Also, quit asking me if this will be my last child. I would just like to get through this pregnancy before making any formal plans about the ultimate size of my family. I know this is a question that a lot of people want an answer to and I know that since I am batting a thousand for high risk, high stress pregnancies that many people have opinions about this. I will tell you this: it is a very rude and personal question. Frankly, it is none of your business about what my husband and I decide. So unless you are one of the members of my medical team you have no say and no right to ask me about my future plans. We could be a family of four or fourteen they may all be biological children or we made decide to adopt. Either way we hope that you will love and accept all of our children, regardless of how they came to be our children.
So my point is writing this is perhaps to make people aware of their words. I know many are spoken in order to give hope and comfort, but sometimes it comes out the opposite.
